


the grown up that i always wanted to be

by Momo (Momo2_0)



Category: Matilda the Musical - Minchin/Kelly
Genre: Agatha Trunchbull (mentioned) - Freeform, Angst, Brianna Phelps (Matilda), F/F, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Jenny needs to learn that she is stronger then she thinks she is, Lesbian Character, Miss Honey is a lebian, Mrs. Phelps first name is Brianna in this, Pre-Relationship, i wrote this at 3 am, so i decided to tell her that through Mrs. Phelps, suprise Mrs. Phelps is a lesbian too, this came out suprisengly wholesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:09:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26016289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momo2_0/pseuds/Momo
Summary: Jenny stops at the Libary after being a bit overwhelmed at her day as the principal of Matilda's school, and ends up getting something a little bit more precious than a good book. a better understanding of a part of herself that she never thought about. and it's delivered from the nice and charming librarian? well, it can't hurt.
Relationships: Miss Honey/ Mrs. Phelps, Miss Honey/Miss Phelps
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	the grown up that i always wanted to be

**Author's Note:**

> **Mrs.Phelps (the librarian) is named Brianna Phelps here, I and my amazing friend oswinosgoodsscarf (who is my amazing editor by the way!!) came up with her name, without further ado, enjoy the story!!

"But you still did it, didn't you?"

The words startled Jenny from her crying session. With her eyes still burning with shame and her throat still tight, she gripped her tissue and stared into Bri's warm eyes, fighting back the rest of her tears.

"What?"

"You still did it though!" Brianna cried, opening her hands in a 'well there you go!' gesture. She smiled brightly at Jenny, or at least it looked like a smile from Jenny's corner view of the librarian.

It was a less than busy day at the library; it always tended to be a quiet day whenever Jenny visited, go figure. But Jenny was not about to complain about the much needed peace and quiet: She never got it when she was teaching her loud and happy kids- she loved them all, of course, but sometimes the sudden shouting still made her jump and hunch inwards for protection, and that… became exhausting 24/7. So the quiet library was always a refuge for Jenny to go when she felt a little overwhelmed (a little too overwhelmed, but she is not ready to admit it to herself yet) and have some tea with the nice (sometimes overly excited) librarian.

Steam from the tea she was holding wafted upwards. Still hot, she hadn't had any of it yet, more focused on the conversation with the happy librarian, who as always, was waiting at the desk for Jenny; tea pot already warming on the stove, making Jenny smile for the first time that day with her exuberance. It's always nice to have someone excited to actually spend time with her, other than Matilda at home. And while Jenny loves her very dearly, it's just nice to have that with someone mature! Or- well, Matilda's certainly mature but-  
Jenny quelled her runaway thoughts before she could make a fool of herself, snapping back to reality as she heard Bri laugh.

"You don’t have to make sense all the time dear- (oh dear, did she really say all of that out loud-) but at least I see you got a smile on your face now! Are my words finally sinking in?"

Jenny felt herself blushing bright red and averted her eyes, blowing a little on her hot cuppa as a distraction. Glancing up at Brianna's expecting gaze "I might… have forgotten what you said, my apologies-"

"No, it's OK! Miss Hon-Jenny, it tends to be like that with things we hold within ourselves, we wait so long to say them that when we do, it's hard to really take anything else in, as we enjoy our relief so much."  
Bri smiled, rocking back and forth to help her focus on the conversation better herself.

"You told me what happened when you went to this horrible principal's office, how you were so scared of everything happening to Matilda because of your request... of something happening to you." At that she gave a stern look to Jenny, before continuing, "And how you felt "pathetic" and "useless", at that Bri shook her head in disagreement, "Because you couldn't just bring yourself to just knock on the door faster?"

Jenny didn't get it, where was Bri going with this?

"Because… I am? If I could have just went into her office right away I could maybe have stood up to her better and-"

"Ah ah ah!" Bri shook her finger at Jenny, her fond and concerned look that dominated this conversation being replaced by a stern and more focused look that Jenny haven't seen too often on the excited and energetic librarian.

"But you did it! Jenny, we all have fears. And your fear…" she paused, her eyes filled with… care, from what Jenny can gather because she felt her eyes tearing up again, she couldn't look away from Bri's kind and caring look (Bri's eyes were fascinating… no one had ever looked at Jenny like that before).

"Your fear comes from your experiences; it's more realistic than most... and I am so sorry that you had to experience that, Jenny." Bri actually rubbed her eyes, apparently tearing up as well, and stopped to take a couple of tissues to blow her nose loudly.

"But my point is! My point is, that you still did it!! That's what you did! That's what you do everyday!! You face your fears!! Kicking them in the ass, more like! Uh, wait, you’re a teacher, you can't kick people in the ass-"

Bri's musings were interrupted by Jenny's tiny laugh, "It seems that both of us have let our minds wander today." Jenny snorted, which brought out Brianna's own booming laugh. They sat there, laughing together as the clouds flew up above the little library. And Miss Honey had her first true laugh of the day as well, thanks to the magic of tiny libraries and enchanting librarians.

"You faced your fear, Jenny! You did it! No matter whether your fear and anxiety was justified or not-which it was, don't look at me like that-you still did it! You were met with a tough situation and you persevered! And later, when you went and tried to talk to Matilda's…" she sighed, "apparently awful parents, you still went there and tried! And for that, you are one of the bravest people I know!"

Jenny smiled, finally drinking from her now lukewarm tea. But it didn't matter; her heart was warmed by the effusive and charming librarian by her side. A true miracle. As Bri started to go on a completely different rant of her own, Jenny smiled, already feeling a little more like the grown-up she always wanted to be.

**Author's Note:**

> if I could I would have hugged Miss Honey myself, as I really see her as the person I was in high school. I too needed to be told that I do have anxiety, but the fact that i manage to still be the person who I am, managing to face it everyday, is why I am so brave. me and Miss Honey move closer and closer to be the grown-ups we want to be every single day
> 
> thank you so much for reading this story!! its my first fanfic that I ever wrote solo and I couldn't be more proud. please comment if you want! you grow only by getting feedback! :)


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